Over the years, I have met the occasional person with the ability to stay largely in the present and they display remarkable objectivity and simplicity and are unperturbed by other peoples opinions or external actions of almost any sort etc.
However, I have to say that these same people almost always have the ability to be incredibly inconsiderate and self-centred at times and that seems far from enlightened to me! I think it comes from the same source in that they just "don't mind" what other people think and they keep doing what ever it is they feel like. They truly just don't care... but I think in many cases they have unfortunately just "thrown the baby out with the bath water"...
I believe it is fine to be independent and not care at all about other peoples thoughts or opinions about ones self. However I also believe that it is a fundamental moral principal to care about other people - all other people (and animals and plants and rocks and dirt for that matter) . Its called Compassion and essentially its about respect!But I simply don't care about that other person, and what they are doing is wrong anyway!
Well, that just doesn't cut it!It may well be that that person has absolutely nothing to do with your life and you may not ever see them again. It may also be that what they are doing or thinking is pointless from your perspective or wrong or possibly even downright destructive to other people animals, plants, things etc...
I believe that we still have to respect them in a certain way!
I know that sounds hard to swallow but what I'm talking about is not the persons behaviors or their ideas, but more about their "inner humanity". Its like that idea that "all people are created equal". Clearly, on the outside, people are anything but equal, but it is without doubt a huge step forward in society when we agree that there is something deep and sacred in every person. - Magnacarta for the British, and the Constitution for the States etc... These all come from the same idea and it is a truly "Great" idea!
For myself, I believe that it goes way past just applying to people and in fact applies to absolutely everything (particularly things that have not been changed by human activities), right down to rocks. I know in the past that I have asked my fellow hikers not to move rocks around for their tent placements when we are in a very remote and "pristine" natural place, and I know some of my friends are very careful about even leaving footprints on remote alpine lake beaches. This is all the same idea - its respect.
So, back to those really unpleasant people that we run across. I too often have a really strong urge to make their lives difficult and to "teach them a lesson", but it is a very bold person who thinks they know what is best for someone else! And those bold people pretty much always end up on the receiving end of their own judgments given time, or so it seems to me!
So I think that the only acceptable way to impinge on someone elses life and choices is with love and acceptance. If there is any will or malice in it at all, chances are the effort will be misdirected and the results will be a failure. Again this is compassion.
And then there are all those incredibly sad and undesirable things that we see every day. Things that we would love to see changed or fixed or different... Its no wonder that most people who live in cities are so emotionally walled off from each other, There is so much confronting us all the time (more so than in smaller towns with less density I think) that we feel we need to put those walls up just to survive.
The trouble is that those walls that we put up to keep the pain out also keep the pain in. And those same walls also keep the "light" out and again keep the inner light in... Its a real "catch 22" problem.
So, how does one deal with it.
Answer is that I don't really know for sure but again knowing that it is happening is a big step. For myself I am finding that the "acceptance" thing really helps me with this one. I no longer feel that if I care then I absolutely need to intervene and try to fix every wrong that I see. I'm also accepting of myself and I believe that we all have energy to put into good causes but that these causes are different for each of us. If I feel it is the time and the place and the appropriate problem for me to put energy into then I do. If it is not the right situation then I don't, but I don't then go and beat myself up for not doing anything, and I don't try to tell myself that I don't care... And I certainly try very hard not to tell other people that they "should do something or other"...
As I said though, its a really tricky one to balance but that's what its all about - finding a balance!
I believe that we still have to respect them in a certain way!
I know that sounds hard to swallow but what I'm talking about is not the persons behaviors or their ideas, but more about their "inner humanity". Its like that idea that "all people are created equal". Clearly, on the outside, people are anything but equal, but it is without doubt a huge step forward in society when we agree that there is something deep and sacred in every person. - Magnacarta for the British, and the Constitution for the States etc... These all come from the same idea and it is a truly "Great" idea!
For myself, I believe that it goes way past just applying to people and in fact applies to absolutely everything (particularly things that have not been changed by human activities), right down to rocks. I know in the past that I have asked my fellow hikers not to move rocks around for their tent placements when we are in a very remote and "pristine" natural place, and I know some of my friends are very careful about even leaving footprints on remote alpine lake beaches. This is all the same idea - its respect.
So, back to those really unpleasant people that we run across. I too often have a really strong urge to make their lives difficult and to "teach them a lesson", but it is a very bold person who thinks they know what is best for someone else! And those bold people pretty much always end up on the receiving end of their own judgments given time, or so it seems to me!
So I think that the only acceptable way to impinge on someone elses life and choices is with love and acceptance. If there is any will or malice in it at all, chances are the effort will be misdirected and the results will be a failure. Again this is compassion.
And then there are all those incredibly sad and undesirable things that we see every day. Things that we would love to see changed or fixed or different... Its no wonder that most people who live in cities are so emotionally walled off from each other, There is so much confronting us all the time (more so than in smaller towns with less density I think) that we feel we need to put those walls up just to survive.
The trouble is that those walls that we put up to keep the pain out also keep the pain in. And those same walls also keep the "light" out and again keep the inner light in... Its a real "catch 22" problem.
So, how does one deal with it.
Answer is that I don't really know for sure but again knowing that it is happening is a big step. For myself I am finding that the "acceptance" thing really helps me with this one. I no longer feel that if I care then I absolutely need to intervene and try to fix every wrong that I see. I'm also accepting of myself and I believe that we all have energy to put into good causes but that these causes are different for each of us. If I feel it is the time and the place and the appropriate problem for me to put energy into then I do. If it is not the right situation then I don't, but I don't then go and beat myself up for not doing anything, and I don't try to tell myself that I don't care... And I certainly try very hard not to tell other people that they "should do something or other"...
As I said though, its a really tricky one to balance but that's what its all about - finding a balance!
